Dinner with Mosa's family

On Jon's birthday, (66) we were graciously invited by Musa, the doctors' driver, to have dinner with his family.  This is something we were hoping for eventually, but it took us by surprise.  We quickly postponed the birthday dinner we had planned for Jon until Thursday....and gladly accepted.  Bill and Jan were invited also.

Musa with Nazira...8 mos. old

Jon chose the occasion to wear the Perahan Tunban, an outfit of baggy trousers and knee-lenth shirt, topped with a sport coat.  Dr. D had left it here for Jon and he finally found a place to wear it.  Today he was given the Pakool, a wool hat with a flat top that sits on a roll of the cloth on your head....very warming.  So, Jon looks quite smart!'   I wore my black Abaya over my clothes and never took it off for dinner....nor the chAdar (scarf).  Musa had warned they didn't have their Buchari installed yet, so it might be cold.

Musa drove us to his home in Dashte Barchi where he and two brothers live with their families(total of 5 children) , plus their mother and grandfather.  One other brother with 7 children lives in another house but he came to dinner without his family.  We walked up a narrow alley to his gate, inside which was a yard of fruit trees, a water pump (no running water in the house), and tall rose bushes.  He wants Jon to show him how to prune them.

                                                                                                           

Jan washing her hands

Mosa serves us the food

Everyone eats once the eldest starts...me in the corner!

Jon 'relaxing' on the toshak

Once inside the house and our shoes discarded, Musa took us upstairs......"you are not guests, but family, he said."  The guest living room was on the main floor.   The "family" room is lined on three sides with toshaks and pillows.  Musa was very concerned about us crippled old folks whose maladies he's noticed as he transports us around town.  So, he piled up three firm cushions for me to sit on in the corner.  He tried to get Bill to sit on a stool, with his artificial hip that doesn't like to sit cross-legged......but Bill refused at first.  Musa found his children to introduce to us: Madina is 8, Nazira is 6 and Elcina is 8 mos.   His brothers, mother, cousin and nephew gradually arrived.  We had animated conversation for nearly an hour before the youngest boys brought a bowl, pitcher (aftaOlagan) and towels for us to wash and dry  our hands.




WE were seated the farthest from the door since we were the guests, thereby the most important!  And I guess I was THE most important as I was the first to wash my hands!  The 'destarkhAn' (oil cloth) was rolled out on the floor between toshaks and then set with implements before the food arrived.
Musa did an unusual thing and asked us to say the prayer before the meal.  Evidently Muslims pray after the meal.  Jon was delighted to ask Allah to bless this family and meal.






Rice is at the heart of every afghan meal, and it is prepared many ways.....all of them oily and flavorful.  Musa, as the host, spooned the food onto our plates....and kept piling it on!  They love having guests eat a lot!  On the menu was MantU, a gound lamb mixture in pasts and sauce;  cooked Spinach; ChapII Kabab, huge meatballs made of lamb, seasoned and sauced; Ashak, tasty pockets of spice in a spring roll wrapper, with meat sauce, yoghurt and spices on top; nAn and  fresh vegetable platters!  A scrumptious meal!  Afghan meals end with fruit and we were all given an apple with a small knife for peeling.




As the food settled in our stomachs, the humor spiked up.  Musa kept up his concern over our elderly frames sitting on the toshaks.  He finally got Jon to recline by showing him how.

Grandmother holding Elcina

Nazira had a headache all day, so Jon is listening to his lungs with a stethoscope Musa had on hand.  All signs pointed to a bad cold, like many have had.

Musa left the room at one point and returned with his hand behind his back.  "Which hand do you choose," he said, with his sweet chuckle.  Out came these canes which Musa was given many years ago.  He says they are antiques, maybe older than Jon!  And he wants Drs. Jon and Bill to have them.  He thinks maybe I could use Jon's!

  Musa has been an important person in Jon's day.   He drives him wherever he needs to go, and comes back to take me shopping at FINEST (grocer) maybe once a week. He changes money with the curbside banker, haggles prices for me with the local merchants on the street.  He'll go find Jon whatever gadget (heater, adapters,  toilet seat) he needs.  And he keeps Jon laughing.  They discuss Islam, the Qa'ran, the Bible stories (Moses is his namesake). Musa gives him his opinion on hospital gossip, the news, the culture, etc.  He's only 34 years old....the age of two of our own children.  He has worked for foreigners connected to NGO's for nearly ten years.....since the Taliban was ousted.  Before that he lived in Pakistan for a few years.

 Musa is one of our cherished friends here and we were so  grateful to have been invited to his home......and for the bounteous spread his wife prepared for us.  These are the fruits of our visit to Afghanistan: relationships. When he took us home, he said this was one of his best evenings.  I think Musa makes lots of 'best evenings' for many people as he chooses to see life that way.

THANK YOU!!!